since i last talked to my roommate who will be moving in a few weeks, i've been thinking about the worst case senario. well, okay, not really the worst of all cases, but bad enough for me to cringe at the thought. what if...

i find NY just not my cup of tea,
and i make no friends here,
AND don't have TV and internet for a month, which my roommate said could be a possibility?

to be prepared, i brought a backpack full of books and planned to look up some local libraries. but when i turned on my laptop to see if i had saved an article for work, i heard a very familiar 'chi-ching' sound -- i have wireless in the apt! :D

i'm in safe zone now.

________
moved in last night with a friend and her brother who helped me a lot. my place is small but nice. love the neighborhood since it's very residential and quiet. has all the stores i need to live happily, except for Target or Walmart. i felt funny carrying bags of laundry detergent, trash can, cleaning supplies in the subway. i already miss the convenience of driving, parking, shopping, parking and coming home.

anyways, just saying i'm alright so far. work starts tomorrow.
currently cleaning and folding clothes.
thankful.

yeah yeah yeah, it hasn't been a week. but i couldn't resist before i turn off this computer ...

1 down, 3 more to go :)

approximately 14 hours ago, i asked myself 'what will my life consist of without exams for the next eight weeks?' seriously.

and about 8 hours ago, midway into the 160 questions i had in front of me, i said, 'amy, just 9 more pages and you're out.'

and i AM done!!!

three things i really can't do efficiently: folding laundry, packing, and unpacking.
*sigh* the next few days won't be that fun at all. alright, i'm out. for real.

from my notes
amygdala plays a central role in facilitating the significacne of environmental stimuli in selection of appropriate food, or a mate, or avoidance of dangerous situations or substances.

i bet the shape of my amygdala deviates from the norm by a significant measure. so i think.

___________________
i find studying for a test with one day left before the end of school too torturous. (but then again, studying itself is torturous for me. so why did i sign up for more school?!?!)

keeping a mental list of things i need to do, that i should do, and those that i want to do, along with the gazillion (so it seems) names of brain parts, is challenging my own brain to its limit.

need more green tea.
i'm in pursuit of healthier life style -- no coffee until tomorrow morning.

i'm finally getting excited for the summer as i neglect the small fact that i am going to ny for work. i've gotten in touch with old highschool friends, college friends in town.. perhaps, i can google-search where my middle school friends are?(chong and jane, what are your numbers? i'm so bad at saving phone numbers.)

come this sunday, i'll be moving in to an empty apartment that awaits me with a bed and nothing else. so until i find a coffee shop with wireless, ciao! (or as i used to spell it, CHOW! ;)
___
wish me luck... i'm kinda scared...

=)
so i guess i don't need to go grocery shopping before taking off :P

so i have an important question.

where does one go grocery shopping in nyc? i know it's random but the questions just popped in my head while i was having dinner. i don't recall seeing mega supermarkets in the city. are they tucked away inbetween buildings? or do new yorkers buy their groceries from those little corner shops?

must know this soon.
because i might have to stop by Superfresh on my way up for extra boxes of my favorite cereal. i won't be happy without my cereal this summer.


_______________________
only five more days left. it's too difficult to get myself motivated for that last exam. ah wells...

"The Lord is close to those who are brokenhearted and saves those crushed in spirit." psalm 34:18

* * * *

yesterday i dozed off every hour and even had to take a nap in the evening. mind you, i rarely take naps unless the professor is urging me to do so with his monotonous voice in lecture halls.

someone told me we have 11 more days until summer. knowing that i only have 11 more days has officially set 'summer' in my mind already. of the 38 exams that were scheduled since mid-august, i have 2 more to go. slowly bits of memories and reflections over the past year are tempting me away from work but all in all, i end up saying, thank You!

so i ordered something online last week. i was hoping that i get them that week but they didn't arrive. i was fine. i could wait.

come this week, i find myself seriously thinking about skipping a few classes just to stay home for the post man. but i didn't. i wanted to be good this week to make up for the bad from the week before.

but every afternoon, i found myself squinting my eyes while unlocking the front door of our building to see through the glass any sort of package awaiting me. if not there, i would go up to my floor, fingers crossed in the elevator that the postman was nice enough to deliver it to the door.

and just before i turn into my hallway, i stuck my head out first just to see.

it's been a several days of disappointment.

i figured that something must be done. more than just tracking the mail online. i called the store i ordered from. they told me to wait. i called the post office that should have my package number 3230495879439845. she said i should wait, although she's not sure where it is. (huh? uh..alrighty then.) i called the private mailing service that was used by the store. she told me i should have gotten it two days ago. am i weird for being so aggressive with this?

there's no point in this story. just writing because i woke up from a nap after my exam and i didn't know what to do with my life. you know, other than cleaning, paying bills, calling people, and doing things that normal people do during the day.

good night.

say hello here during my temporary absence. they say absence makes the heart grow fonder. so you see, it's all out of love that i take this leave ;)

_______
just being melodramatic as i foresee the turbulent ride through this week.


oh yeah, it was pretty hot today. too hot to listen to npr. hot enough for me to choose britney over ... sheryl crow, was it? and i had to sing with my nose pinched. how else could i imitate her nasal voice?

oops... i just republished the whole blog. i.e. my original page design is gone! :( (i'm actually more disturbed than that frown face can express...) and these polka dots are starting to annoy me.

okay, back to work.

man, this is WAY too tempting to fiddle around with for the rest of the night. S.O.S. someone please do something!


yeah, i'm just going crazy with the inner forces of good and evil. find out which wins! if i have links and comments set up, then the evil get the point. if no more work done on this page, there's still some good in (self)me.

man, that last paragraph is just doodles of heresy.

once again,
stress level high.

the guilt after spending four hours at a mall,
the knowledge of 1000+ calories and a few day's worth of fat that came with the enjoyment of ice cream earlier,
on top of this great temptation to explore the new blogger

y'all aren't helping me!!!
*insert extremely angry face*

__________
woo... you can change the posting time manually. does this mean i can post for the future? niice. :D

wow baby... blogger grew up big time while i was gone!

another lesson learned this week -

don't be so picky with people. i'm not perfect .. don't expect others to be.

(actually my 7th grader teacher in Wood & Metals said this to me once. i was arguing with my group partner while designing a creative bookstand. i used to like the hands-on learning and making projects back then.)

and you are free to remind me of this at any point in time. not about the bookstands, but about how imperfect i am. always in God's grace. often in grace of other people as well...

oh boy do i have a lot to write. but i must keep it short..

first,
I ran the whole time during the race! that was such a big deal for me and luckily it wasn't too bad. i 'jogged' with another friend from class and we made it through. thank you thank you thank you ;) (the time isn't that impressive, i'm sure .. all i know is that we made the 2miles point in 22 min. *shrug* fine enough for me.)

oh, and at the finish line, a bird pooped on my shoulder. yup. but my friend immediate said it's a good luck in turkey to have a bird poop on you.... so i walked around proud with my bird poop ;)

secondly,
i had put my life on hold in the past 36 hrs and was on craiglist like it was the stock market. at the end (yes, the search is over) i came out with much humility about my neurotic personality, and a minor lesson about life : sell yourself with lots of good adjectives. if all fails, be cute and funny.. people may respond to you better. during this short period of desperation, i even denied my love for meat and said, i am willing to be vegetarian in the house. (and i was really serious.) never will i deny what i believe to be my love. (i had temporarily forgotten that spam was meat, you know?)

thirdly.... thirdly i should log off and stay away from internet. no more stories.

oh and lastly, to those that i contacted personally for advice, help, and support : amy sends barrels of appreciation and love.
laters!

i don't know what i'm not sleepy!! and my last caffeine intake was before noon!

but i should force myself to sleep. 'though i've strategically planned out my tomorrow that excludes any classroom attending, i should wake up early.

i emailed like 20 people in 3 hours. all of whom i never met, yet i have my fingers crossed for at least one or two replies.

so....
this saturday morning, i will be running a 5K in Race for Cure. now now, maybe to you 5K is a short jog in the breeze but for me, dude, i needed to be 'trained.' around this time last year, i thought running a mile was a milestone in my life. i still haven't figured out what got into me to sign up for the race - maybe because i can technically walk it through with old-er people or that it's part of my ex-sorority's philanthropy? or i just got really big-headed with my 2 mile achievement and thought another mile should be a piece of cake? (big mistake.)

as the day draws near, all i can do is ask that i finish without stopping. i hope to step on that finish line with everything intact and functional.

i do exaggerate. but i am kinda scared.

too many things on my mind are keeping me away from memorizing sensory tracts. i better not have hit the wall for this semester. so close to the finish line! happy friday =)

i'm worried about this saturday.
:T

i'll share later.


________
for my ex-crush ross, i will watch Friends tonight ;) man, can't believe that the show's been on since my highschool days. (perhaps even earlier? probably... my first episode was seen across the pacific.)

peanut butter time!

after the coffee shop, i went over to a classmate's house for this year's last fellowship meeting. just a few chill people and one extremely cute lab dog.

we had a mini med-school ranting session, followed by a prayer session, and a long eating session, consisting of strawberries, grapes, very creamy cheese dip with totilla chips. my friend and i drove back under a full moon and a cool breeze.

i would give today a quite a high rating.
i hope i can keep it up until the end of this month.

after my test yesterday, these are what i accomplished:

had bento lunch with friends for two hours
walked around the mall for three hours
watched Big Fish (finally) on a humongous flat screen tv three feet away
went grocery shopping at two different stores
did my dishes
turned on the tv at 10:30 ... bad move.
watched The Restaurant on Bravo ..not knowing it was a marathon.

around 1am, i said, well, there goes my 8am lecture.
around 2am, i said, well, there goes my 9am lecture.

when i woke up at 9:30, i was, well, there goes my 10am lecture.

breakfast : my new cereal!
called a friend to 'study' at a coffee shop that had wireless ;)
she said, okay, i'll meet you after our ethics course.
ethics? we have ethics today??? in 20 minutes? but i'm in my pj's!

____
i'm at the coffee shop (cafegutenberg.com). i need to go because my friend is studying really hard and i'm not.

thanks for listening to my briefing of yesterday and today. have a good day.

do you think it's really bad to have a spoonful of peanut butter right now?

okay, half a spoon.

mmm ...

hmm ...

dilemmas after midnight...

oh man....

i missed both ben & jerry's and baskin robbin's free scoop nights!
*sigh*
so bummed, i can't study anymore...

this is what happens when i'm not in sync with the world news.
*shaking head in disapproval*

with some kalbi (korean short ribs) i had brought from home, we had a 'secret' bbq party at a friend's house. if i had known how much meat i had ... and that my friends really know and like to cook, we would have invited more people to share.

i seem to outeat others when it comes to meat. i also seem to have had carnivores for college friends because people here are disappointing me with their capacity. (example. guys eat about 12- 15 buffalo wings on average here. i'm used to 25-30 from my college guy friends) just a random fact.

currently at the library. still full from last night's dinner. still smelling like bbq... but i didn't have time to shower:P hehehe. that will be postponed until the afternoon.

have a good weekend!